I’ve begun to feel a quiet steadfastness to my faith that I’ve never felt before. The days of anxious questioning and restless searching for all the answers are gone.
Some questions have been answered.
Others have been answered for now.
Still a few linger unanswered, with the whispering wonder that perhaps I’ll never quite know until I see Jesus face-to-face.
It’s come slowly.
Mostly when I didn’t notice it was happening.
…this quiet assurance in three things.
The assurance of who God is.
The assurance of who I am in Him.
The assurance that His Word is true…completely, no matter what I feel or think or see.
I remember in high school and college, talking for hours over those big life questions and searching for answers to perceived biblical contradictions and listening to lectures on the scientific and archeological evidence for the Bible’s truth.
And that searching was good and needed and it has built my knowledge wide. But the absolute decision, the quiet assurance came later.
The firm and calming knowledge that I believe the Word of God is truth and that I will base my life upon the revelation of God that it gives us has begun to come in the past few years. Years that haven’t been spent searching and studying…
Because the knowledge and the facts and the evidence are good, but they alone cannot bring that quietness in my soul. The quietness comes from knowing God personally, intimately.
Knowing that when I stumble He is there to catch me, because He has caught me before.
Knowing that when I’m doubting His love He loves me still, because I’ve read His Words of love over and over.
Knowing that when I’m hurt and angry He is guiding me to love and forgiveness, because He has taught my heart to forgive before.
Knowing that when I’m broken and humiliated He is holding me still, because He has held me and washed me and forgiven me already on the cross.
Knowing that when I’m scared to step out in faith or stay put in faith He will not let go of me, because He’s never let go of me before.
The knowledge is good, and if you’ve never studied the evidence, I suggest you do…
But the quiet assurance that He is God, that His Word is true, and that no matter what happens I will love Him, comes from walking in faith with Him…day after day, season after season. Because you’ll never learn to trust someone if you never begin to lean on them in faith.
It’s in the leaning in and the stepping out that our faith is built and that the quiet assurance of soul and mind grows strong.
I’m so thankful for this quietness that I’m beginning to feel in my soul. This quiet knowledge that He is my God and I am loved by Him and no matter what happens to me or around me, He is good.