It’s a new year this week.
Full of the sparkle and shine of possibility.
It’s an empty book just waiting to be filled and
…I love that.

Many years I’ve pondered slow and deep and filled pages and pages of my journal with reflections and intentions and plans.

the past few years my mom has given me a planner for christmas – such a great gift

This year…I’m not.
At least not yet.
I am a firm believer that the whole of January is the beginning of the new year and I have that entire month to reflect and plan. So I still have time to change my mind.

But this year, there’s just one thing that keeps resurfacing for me as I look ahead.
And behind.
A carryover, perhaps, of all I’ve pondered and prayed these last few months.

I want to ask God for wisdom.
More. More wisdom. More often.
I want to ask Him to guide my decisions.
Big and small.
I want to ask what He desires me to do. How I should be spend the precious hours He’s given me? Where should I invest energy and attention?

I don’t expect to get a message from heaven each time. Or a miraculous word of guidance.

But I do except to be guided subtly and gently.
I expect to be moved, because I move. Not God.
I expect my heart and mind to move into alignment with God. I don’t expect words from heaven, but I expect Him to change me as I seek His heart. And as He brings me closer to His heart, I expect my decisions, large and small, to shift.

And I suspect, that on occasion, a clear answer might come.

I’ve spent the tail end of this year completely overwhelmed by everything there is to do. And I can’t at all see how I will accomplish it’s scope and breadth.
I can’t figure out how to figure out what to prioritize and what to let go of.

And yet, this stubborn heart is learning slowly. The only way to truly grow is to ask for help. And who better to ask than the God who created the universe, and me?

So that’s it. That’s my one goal.
…for now.
To ask God for wisdom, for guidance, for help more often. For the small things, not just the big. And to ask that He bring my heart closer to His in the process.

~ Alesha

Christmas Card 2022

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