Our cold snap happened over Thanksgiving.It was 68…
Yet now it’s in the low 80s again and I’m jealous of all the crazy, gorgeous snow pictures filling up my Instagram feed. After a week of my whining, the sun is finally back out and I’m feeling sweaty.
And contentment never just happens.
And I’m reminding myself probably 20 times a day how miserable the cold makes me and what a blessing it is to be here, but my heart doesn’t always want to listen to my brain.
So I’ll dream with a eggnog latte in my hand and Christmas decorations in blue and silver. And I’ll live vicariously through your Instagrams and thank hard for sunshine and warmth and the ability to test different deodorants till I find one that at least keeps me from stinking.
Because sometimes thanking is hard…
Not because the words are hard.
Not because there is nothing to thank for.
Not because I’m not happy.
But because I have to lay me down. I have to lay down my wants and wishes and selfishness. Because my selfishness is a comfortable place to hang out sometimes. Because I have to let Him into a place of my heart that I don’t want to admit is ugly.
And I know in that moment and decision of thanksgiving that I must make up my mind to have my heart changed. In that moment, I must admit that my heart needs changing.
I know that in my offering of thanks, He will gently reorder my heart away from the self-pitying and self-centered place it is currently residing. And I know that is a beautiful thing. But to get to the beautiful, I have to first recognize the ugly…and that’s where the hard lies. So I’m praying that He gives me the strength and humility to keep admitting the ugly and allowing His Spirit to change it.
So enjoy with me some beauty via my Instagram feed and let’s make the hard decision to thank…in whatever place of life you’re feeling discontent today.